Terrorizing the Low Maintenance Boyfriend: A Trip to the Beauty Supply


As previously mentioned, my boyfriend, Mike isn’t exactly salon savvy (although he’s no stranger to the barber shop). After working a sixty hour week, we used his day off to run errands. While cruising down the street, a beauty supply shop caught my eye.

“I need to stop in there real quick,” I said as I hung a sharp right.

“Where?”

“The beauty supply– you don’t have to go in if you don’t want to.”

He raised his eyebrows. “No, I’ll go with you.” Mike is the sweetest type of boyfriend who will follow you to hell and back– just because you’re feeling needy or codependent.

My running list included: Hair cholesterol, 2 pumice stones, 1 nail buffer, 1 nail file, pink nail polish, and topcoat.

Although I moved swiftly to the hair masque section, Mike stopped and stared in a state of quizzical wonder. His eyes followed the shelves up and down and I smiled to myself and grasped a tan colored jar.

“What’s that?”

“Cholesterol.” I explained, “It’s like, super-duper strong conditioner.”

He followed me to the next aisle. “Why don’t you just use eggs in your hair?”

I said, “Because I’m a feminist.”

“What?”

“Never mind. Why would I use eggs when I can just use cholesterol?”

He eyed the price tag. “It seems cheaper.”

“That’s old fashioned. My grandma and her sorority sisters used to do that.”

Mike’s eyes glazed over as we perused the bountiful nail shaping supplies and he dialed his best friend. He said, “Hey, man! Guess where I am right now?” Pause. “Nope. At the beauty supply store with Ashley.” Pause. Laugh. Pause. “She needs hair cholesterol.” When I motioned, Mike stuck out his pinky and allowed me to test two lacquers on his unpolished nails. I held up the bottles and he picked 80s pink over a bubblegum color. “Cholesterol? Oh, it’s like an intense conditioner.” Pause. Mike moved the receiver away from his mouth. “He says you should just put eggs in your hair!”

I rolled my eyes.

Good Read: Robert Jones’ MAKEUP MAKEOVERS


There are a lot of makeup books and tutorials out there, but none that I’ve seen can compare to the sage wisdom Robert Jones shares in Makeup Makeovers. For those who are unfamiliar with his work, Robert Jones is an amazing celebrity makeup artist; he’s worked with one of my personal favs, Cindy Crawford (remember what she taught me about eyebrows) and done makeup for all the major magazines. For those who want to simply take my word for it, the man knows what he’s talkin’ about, Willis.

The book is divided into three parts and consists of a collective, twelve chapters. Part one is a bit of a vocabulary lesson and focuses on the meaning behind makeup terminology. What different cosmetics do and how to apply them– and what purpose the tools serve. Part two discusses the individual and is where the book really heats up. He neatly describes skin tone classifications and the contrast between warm versus cool tones. In addition, the book discusses face shape and contouring with simplified diagrams. During the third part, appropriately titled, “Putting it all together,” Jones discusses how the reader can take what they’ve read and apply it to their specific face.

The book is somewhat repetitive, but this angle works well for the purpose of a how-to. His consistency assures the cosmetic novice and inspires makeup savvy girls. Although Jones’ writing is clear and helpful, the greatest testament to his skill is in the before and after photos. Amazing. The women in the before photos could be Walmart, Publix, or Dollar General shoppers. The results, however, reflect a sophistication projected by women in the media. The faces depicted are “real” people. That proves how good “we” can look and showcases Jones’ skill. And, of course, he shows how gorgeous ridiculously, pretty women (models) are when all glammed-up.

I hungrily blew through Jones’ book in an evening and enjoyed his perspective. His take on natural beauty is refreshing–and so is his makeup style. Wether you’re a working Makeup Artist, like myself, or are newly curious about cosmetics, Jones’ methodic book offers a strong education.