Terrorizing the Low-Maintenance Boyfriend: A Lesson in Eyebrow Waxing


To hear my boyfriend tell it, I, “came at [him] with a pair of tweezers.” This statement implies two things. First, his words suggest an attack movement on my part, however the plucking was done with love and care. Second, it’s not like I didn’t warn him by saying, “Sit tight–I’ll be right back with my tweezers.”

Let me tell you a little about Mike: Ex-Marine. Quarterback. Basketball shorts. Despite a successful career in toughness, Mike’s kind heart affords him the tolerance to withstand my “torturous” whims– which brings us back to brow maintenance.

I combed and trimmed his brows with ease and marveled at how this step makes such an amazing difference every time–especially on men. Aestheticians, including myself, do this before plucking or waxing; combing brows upward and trimming offers instant results and low risk to ruining their shape. However, the tweezers pushed Mike over the edge.

“Just let me wax them,” I offered.

He retorted, “Hell no!”

“But this is my job. I do this for a living- waxing is way easier than tweezing.”

“No.”

“But you get pedicures…”

He growled, “That’s for the [leg] massage! No.”

Boyfriends and beaus past always accepted my brow maintenance attempts with quiet reserve and surrender. Mike’s resistance presented a new challenge and I silently vowed I’d get to wax those brows. Later, I casually mentioned the football coach who is a body waxing client. “No.” I told him I wouldn’t do a complete brow design, but would only clean them up. “No.”

He called his mother to say hello and tattle about how wicked I was for daring to tweeze three eyebrow hairs. She told him, flatly, that her husband waxed regularly. Although Mike raised a bushy brow in consideration, he maintained the “devil wax” wouldn’t leave the Honee pot.

A few hours later, I was offered the deal of a lifetime when Mike bartered information for brows. My eyes lit up. “So, if I tell you, you’ll really let me wax them?”

“Yes.”

High levels of testosterone, as found in males, generally indicate a surplus in hair growth. The hair is often thick, coarse, and dark. Unless you’re a Doctor, an Aesthetician, or work for Animal Control, don’t look at the next photo if you’re eating. One, lower-brow swipe did a world of good in the low-maintenance man’s brow routine:

When I swiped the wax across his lower brow bone, he commented that the warm wax was soothing. When I pulled the strip, Mike said the pain was nowhere near what he anticipated. In fact, it really didn’t hurt. We might go for a full-fledged brow design next time, but I considered our session a success:

WINNING!!!!

Advertisements

I gave the dog a designer bath and all I got was this lousy growl.


The dog hates getting a bath about as much as I hated getting shots as a kid. I hid under the exam table; she slinks under the bed. I used to scream and cry and Lily can’t help but whimper. Poor Mother always received nasty looks during and after the whole ordeal. Karmatically, my canine companion reflects similar scowls. The whole thing sucks.

Although I’m forever changing pillowcases, when all the sheets come off the bed, the dog gets a bath; Lily is more instinctive than most Malteses and scoots under the bed before the comforter hits the floor. She gives me the please, no, Mama eyes.

I look away and a part of me wonders, what’s so terrible about dirty dogs, anyhow?

My inner-Aesthetician insists she’s going on strike if I allow a stinky pup to sleep on the pillow beside my face. My inner-responsible/mean dog owner concurs.

Lily’s regular shampoo is Matrix’s Hydrotherapy; it’s effective and gentle on her hair (the hypo-allergenic Maltese breed has hair, not fur), but she always retains the faint odor of wet dog. However, tonight we tried Pet Head’s Dirty Talk Shampoo and she smells even better than when I pick her up from the groomer.

The scent, “Fruit Fantasy,” smells divine and reminds me a lot of the [now discontinued] “Fruit Cocktail” conditioner Farouk produced until the mid-2000s. Pet Head products are all and cruelty, paraben, DEA, and sulfate free. Because the product is sulfate-free it does not bubble like other products containing foaming agents. As a result, the product rinsed away quickly and cut Lily’s torture time in half. Bonus.

She seemed a little less testy this time– all residual resentment melted as she methodically gnawed on a bone.

5 Ways to Fight Breakouts


With oily skin that is also sensitive, I can always count on a semi-hormonal breakout the week before my period. To an Aesthetician, like myself, the tell-tale sign of a hormonal breakout includes blemishes along the jaw line, chin, and lower cheek area. Because I know my body, and a thing or two about the skin, I try to combat intrinsic conditions with 5 little steps:

1. Change Pillow Cases Nightly: In a perfect world, we’d all receive 8 hours of sleep per night. 8 hours of sleep, times 7 nights, equals 56 hours of sleep each week. Bacteria replicates in the presence of oxygen and skin oils collect in the cotton fibers. Changing pillow cases every 1-2 nights ensures you’re not replacing the bacteria you’ve just cleansed away.

2. Wash Makeup Brushes Weekly: Washing brushes is important for the same reasons previously explained. However, I feel this is a little more crucial simply because mid-day touch-ups occur on skin that’s been exposed to sweat, oil, and bacteria– brushes absorb these pollutants and are repeatedly deposited on the face with each flick of a brush. Baby shampoo works as a gentle, weekly cleanser for brushes.

3. Clean Cell 2x/Day: Sweat. Makeup. Oil. Tears. Germs from the counter top. Germs from your hands. Germs from your desk. On your face. Wiping your cell phone 1-2 times/ day will greatly reduce breakouts around the jaw line.

4. Cleanse 2x: Cleansing the face in the morning and at night is essential. The first cleanse removes dirt, surface oils, and makeup. The second cleanse, or lather, actually penetrates the skin and provides benefit. If you only lather your face once, your follicles may remain clogged; this leads to comedones (black heads), then pustules (white heads), and then papules (acne cysts).

5. Use Professional Products: Professional products are essential starting at the molecular level; the size of the particles is milled to a fine size that penetrates the skin with ease. In addition, the product itself is made with quality ingredients. Think of it this way: McDonald’s serves cheeseburgers which will fill you up, but a black angus burger on a whole grain bun actually feeds your body. The Image Skincare line  is organic, medical grade, and sells at a reasonable price.